This is a funny time of year! If you are in the southern hemisphere you may be still on your summer break. For those of us in the north, the focus is more likely to be on New Year's Resolutions,setting goals for the year ahead and moving forward towards what you want to create.

I'd like to share with you a variety of points of view about this time of year. Enjoy this smorgasbord and go with whatever resonates with you!

LOOK HOW FAR YOU HAVE COME!
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The month of January is named for the Roman god, Janus. Janus is described as having two faces - one looking forwards and one looking backwards. There's a lot of pressure to keep moving forward towards success. However, we often don't appreciate what we have accomplished or struggled with to get us to where we are today.

Sometimes it is only by looking back that we can see how far we've come. Take a moment to think about what you remember from this past year.

* Did you celebrate the small things that helped you get to where you are today?

- like adapting your language to be understood on the phone; withholding judgment in a new situation; or pushing yourself through your comfort zone to meet new people? These are important milestones that we expats go through.

* What were your most important accomplishments?
* What were the disappointments - and what did you learn from them?

Reflecting on our successes and learnings can not only lift our mood, but give us the energy boost and motivation to keep moving forward.
It's the skills, knowledge, and experience we have gained from our past that give us the ability and courage to confidently tackle the next leg of our adventure!

HOW IS YOUR SELF TALK?
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Making a major change in your life and introducing new ways of doing things is never easy. This can seem doubly true for expats as we adjust to a new culture and different lifestyles and behaviours. It takes perseverance and, even more important, not beating ourselves up when we make a mistake or trip up.

Negative self talk is the biggest factor for holding us back - especially when we believe it to be true!

* What have you been telling yourself lately?
* Is this holding you back?

Now think about how babies learn to walk. They don't have self talk that says "What a failure I am" or "This is too hard - I'll give up".
They are focused on what they want to accomplish and keep at it through the bumps and tears.

What I want for you in this new year is few bumps and tears along the way. Be easy on yourself, watch your self talk and keep your attention on what you really want to accomplish and all that that will bring you. If it's a fulfilling life in a new country, then keep believing that you CAN make it happen!

ARE YOU "SHOULD-ING" THIS NEW YEAR?
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People don't seem to be having enough fun here in the north! There's a lot of talk about doing things that we "should" be doing, setting goals that we "should" be working towards and stopping doing things we "shouldn't" be doing.

If you find yourself "should-ing", then you may well be responding to pressure that is coming from outside of you - from the media, family, colleagues and society. Ask yourself

* Is what I am working towards what I really want or is it a "should"?

There can be a lot of pressure for change, and we know that change isn't easy - especially if it is a response to external pressure or we are not ready for it. For those of us who may not be ready, then I would encourage you to acknowledge that this might not be the right time for you - and that's OK!

The change of the calendar year can be an inspiration and catalyst for change. However, it doesn't have to be. It's OK to relax and take a lesson from our Southern Hemisphere neighbours.

For me, this is a time of year for reflection and preparing for the surge of energy and growth that accompanies Spring. Do what feels right for you!

cheers

Val

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