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Teenage daughter doesn't want to move to Ontario - HELP!!!!!

Discussion forum for expats moving to or living in Canada.

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Re: Teenage daughter doesn't want to move to Ontario - HELP!

Post Posted: Mon Jan 16, 2006 11:16 pm


It sounds like you have covered many of the possible problems in moving here. Having been to Canada is a big advantage over those who "drop in" the first time.

I spent 30 years in the Canadian Armed Forces, first as a uniformed Military Police officer, and later in Military Intelligence, and finally as a trainer at the Canadian Police College. During my career I really did get around the world, and some of the places I went to I would go back to, others you couldn't pay me enough to go back!!! But it does give one a chance to make decisons about where to retire.

About your daughter..............Not to worry about the Canadian history classes, sad to say ( I have a degree in Canadian History ) we don't require more than a one year exposure to the subject at grade 10 level.

It sounds as though she will do well here, after she gets over her initial period of time here. The boyfriend thing is a universal problem , even for those that move with-in Canada.

Should I assume that you will be living in or near to Barrie? If so be advised that the Muskoka lakes area is only 50 miles to the North up higway number 11. The other lady with the 16 yo said she will be there this summer. Perhaps you can meet somewhere.

About the reasons to move here...........I agree that you are doing the right thing. By any sort of measurement, Canada leads the way, be it social, economic, life style or political stability, and education opportunities. And the scenery is not bad either.

Did you know that about 20,000 US citizens move to Canada every year to live and work permanently? Many become Canadian citizens. In the last US Presidential election, all most one million US citiizens, who live in Canada , voted. What does that tell you about this country?

Jim Bunting. Toronto.


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Re: Teenage daughter doesn't want to move to Ontario - HELP!!!!!

Post Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2006 2:23 am

Hi Marion - I sent a private message but not sure if you received it as it still appears to be in my outbox! Obviously don't wish to put much personal info on an open forum page but our cottage is in the huntsville area (about an hour north as Jim states). My daughter appears positive about emigrating but, as mentioned, has spent a lot of summers and winters with family and friends in the area.
This summer we will be up for 3 weeks and if you are visiting it may be fun for them to meet up. We have a bunkie that they stay in - which keeps the giggles and girlieness away (but not to far !) from us.


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Re: Teenage daughter doesn't want to move to Ontario - HELP!

Post Posted: Fri Jan 20, 2006 7:54 pm

Hi there, about 8 years ago when I was 15 my parents decided to move out to Dubai in the UAE. At the time I was just coming up to my final year at school and my GCSE's. I had a boyfriend and a circle of friends and I was very reluctant to leave them all. My family and I made the move and within two weeks I was back in England staying with a friend and her family. After a lot of thought (and a falling out with my friend) I decided to return to Dubai to live with my family. I caused my family a lot of upset and stress during these events. I know this all sounds really negative but the story does have a happy ending I promise!
When I got out there and let myself see what a wonderful time I could have and what a priceless experience I could have, I really did have a brilliant time. I was too young to make the decisions that I did and I do really regret thinking that I knew what was best. When you are young you are reluctant to believe that your parents know best but they usually do! My parents should have made me stay, it wouldn't have taken long to adjust to the new life. I now have a family of my own and we are thinking about emmigrating and I think it is down to my parents showing me that there are so many opportunities out in the world.
I think your daughter would get over her worries after being out there for a while, it might be hard for her at first but think what an experience you can provide for her, I know I've been there.
Good Luck


Re: Teenage daughter doesn't want to move to Ontario - HELP!

Post Posted: Mon Jan 23, 2006 12:25 pm

I am so glad I found this post.

We are in the process of trying to emmigrate to Alberta. We have three girls 15, 13 and 11. The eldest has a boyfriend and is very secure in her circle of friednds. She is starting to say she won't stay when she gets there and the youngest is frightened mostly of being, and remaining, an outsider. She is a lovely girl but does find it difficult to strike up friendships.

We were beginning to think that we were alone in trying to uproot older children. But its a releif to see that we are not. It would be interesting to hear from expats that have made the transition, or some more from those who made a teenage move.

Regards Richard


Re: Teenage daughter doesn't want to move to Ontario - HELP!

Post Posted: Mon Jan 23, 2006 12:43 pm

Hello All,

Great participation in this thread, and such a worthy topic as stress on the kids takes many forms throughout the relocation process.

I am an Executive with a Relocation Management firm in Canada, and we study closely the affects of stress during a relocation. In fact, a lot of the services are geared around minimizing these stresses.

Here is a reference to another posting on these Forums that offers some general suggestions that might also assist.

Click Here:




Toronto Executive Suites - Info: Here


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Re: Teenage daughter doesn't want to move to Ontario - HELP!!!!!

Post Posted: Wed Jan 25, 2006 11:28 pm

Hello Mal,

Since you have gotten almost all possible advice, the only thing I can offer is my daughter’s friends in Canada.

You see, she is also 15, and is living with me in Germany. The adjustment (or lack thereof) has been so huge not only for her but for myself and my 10 year old son. So I can fully sympathize with your child.

We have been here for a little over 2 years and can’t get over the “culture shock” part.

In any event, my daughter keeps her sanity by emailing and using MSN to keep in touch with her friends. Have you decided where you are going to live? May I suggest Oakville? It is a very nice city located on the Ontario Lake about 30 minutes from Toronto. There you will find Appleby College; it is a private and very good school.

I wish you all the best!!



Re: Teenage daughter doesn't want to move to Ontario - HELP!

Post Posted: Tue Jan 31, 2006 8:43 pm

Hi Richard

Thank you for your mail. My daughter has said exactly the same as your daughter in that she won't stay there when she arrives. She has even worked out that she need only stay long enough to obtain her citizenship and then she can go.

I am praying that she will see what a better life she will have once she is there and that it has been done with both her and our son in mind.

I fully appreciate that this is a difficult age for a child....but she is just going to have to come with us. Kids!!!!




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