In my meetings with expats and travellers I’m always amazed at the stories we all have to share. Stories of love, life, challenge and happiness. Our common quest to find our own path in a world that’s always changing, and at the same time mostly repeating itself.
I’ve spoken to many expat women of all ages and parts of the world. The ones who have just met the man of their dreams, trying hard to work out the practicalities of how they can be together, as well as the ones who have lived overseas with the love of their life for over 20 years.Build a life and a family far away from where their life once started. And some of those challenges of relationship past seem to repeat themselves today. Even though the technology of today has made expat life a lot fuller in terms of chances to connection and love.
Many people find themselves asking: with a lot of potential challenges on the horizon, why would you choose a relationship with someone far away from what you call home?
1. You attract what you truly want and need. The love that comes into your life did because you invited it. Because it meets your human needs of adventure, variety, stability, love, growth and connection. Many people search desperately for love in real life as well as on the internet, but when you open up your heart and mind to love from another country you have welcomed a much bigger chance to meet someone who is a true match to you.
2. We always have more things in common than we think. Things are only as different as you want them to be. And we all know that the heart and the attraction does not care much for language barriers. Yes you’ve grow up in different families, school systems, financials, cultures and all the rest. But you still have so much in common. Language barriers and country boarders don’t mean much when you share the same vision and values of life. Understand and accept the differences, but focus on the things you have in common. When our values match and we find a space to let both people express what’s important to them, it does not matter where you are from. At all.
3. Your children will get a mix of 2 worlds, instead of just 100% of one. I’ve met a lot people who grew up with an expat lifestyle and more than one place that they call home. What I’ve found they have in common is the closeness with their family and siblings, as well as their curiosity and acceptance of things that are different. It’s a beautiful thing to give your children the chance to experience more than one view of the world. Even if children will sometimes not understand your choices in the moment, they will almost always thank you later.
4. It gives you an opportunity for teamwork like you’ve never seen it before. Wether you choose to start a family or not, you’ll have true teamwork in your relationship. You simply must work together on a whole different level compared to people who come from the same place. The common ground in an expat relationship is not physical; it’s based on values, respect and joint vision. In a team where the vision is shared, opportunities are endless. The same goes for loving relationships from different countries.
5. You get to live a life opportunity and not of regret. Most people regret at the end of their life what they never dared to do. If your heart is curious to live, travel and love in a place far away, make sure to try it and see if it’s for you. There is no one size that fits all, but one thing is sure. If we don’t give it a go and see what might have happened, we’ll often regret it later.
Love across boarders opens our lives up to a whole new level of love. Yes there will inevitably be challenges. But with the right partner you’ll tackle them together and end up with a relationship stronger than what many only dare to dream of.
Blogger, speaker and relocation expert, Emmy Petersson is passionate about helping everyone to a balanced and happy relocation, regardless where in the world they are moving to and who is coming with them.
Emmy believes there is a big difference between surviving and thriving in a new country. She’s also a firm believer that the right relocation mindset is just as important as any practical checklist.