After moving from Boston to Paris in 2008, Trish built a new life in France, gaining citizenship and opening a retreat business at a 14th-century château in the Pyrenees. She shares the challenges, rewards and lessons of making France home. To learn more, visit the Château de Gère website, or follow Château de Gère on Facebook and Instagram.
Where, when and why did you move abroad?
In 2008, I moved from the US to Paris — and haven’t looked back.
At the time, I was living in Boston and working in marketing for a large international company. I’d been bitten by the travel bug and was jumping at every chance to travel. So when organizational changes were going to relocate me to another part of the US where I had no interest in living, I thought this might be an opportunity for an international assignment. So, I emailed the head of the European operation outside Paris and asked if they needed help in marketing – and to my surprise, he agreed to a transfer.
What started as a two-year expat assignment has become a life I never could have imagined back in 2008. Since then, I’ve obtained French nationality, bought a petite 14th century château in a remote Pyrenean village with more sheep than people, and left corporate life to start a business hosting small group retreats and getaways at the château.
What challenges did you face during the move?
Like many people who move to a foreign country, language was my biggest challenge. While my company handled the administrative side of the move including finding an apartment and arranging for my work visa, everything else was up to me — learning French, understanding the culture, meeting new people, and making the most of the opportunity.
Making friends as an adult in a new country isn’t easy. I was grateful to have discovered Meetup, which turned out to be a great way to meet people who shared my interests — and if I’m honest, I did find it a bit intimidating to walk into those events alone, but I did it anyway, and I’m so glad I did because it led to great friendships, new cultural experiences, and adventures hiking and traveling across France and Europe.
What do you enjoy most about life in your new country?
There is so much to love about life in France — and for me, it’s the little things that I appreciate the most.
When I first arrived, I quickly discovered that locals don’t take their coffee on the go — and certainly not on the metro (as I learned the first week I arrived). You sit down and enjoy it. I love that I can linger over a long lunch or dinner with friends without the bill being served with dessert. And I finally understood the importance of a proper vacation — truly disconnecting for more than a few days without the guilt of not responding to emails.
Since moving to the countryside, I’ve been pleasantly surprised by how warmly my neighbors and community have welcomed me. The weekly farmers market is my favorite day of the week — it’s not just about the groceries. I enjoy chatting with the vendors I’ve come to know and bumping into neighbors during my weekly shop. I’ve also become a regular at the little local recyclerie, where donated items are resold to benefit a local charity and kept out of the landfill. I’ve found quite a few little treasures there!
And then there are the traditions. The annual transhumance is something I look forward to every year — shepherds lead their sheep and cows up to summer pastures high in the mountains while the locals line the streets to cheer them on. A few months later, the cheese festival brings everyone together to celebrate the region’s famous Ossau-Iraty sheep milk cheese and other local varieties, alongside a variety of producers, artisans, and a wonderfully festive atmosphere. And throughout the year, a number of village fêtes and local events take place where neighbors and friends gather and you often hear traditional music and songs performed. I love sharing these experiences with guests and often host retreats to allow visitors to experience these traditions like a local…
What is the hardest part of expat life for you / your family?
At the beginning, it was the language, meeting people, and adjusting to different ways of life. Most shops and businesses are closed during lunch and on Sundays so I had to plan accordingly, and administrative processes can be cumbersome and sometimes seem non-sensical, which can really test your patience. But now, I’ve been here long enough that I’ve adapted and have developed a whole new level of patience, especially here in the countryside where it’s not unusual to get caught in a sheep traffic jam. Today, my biggest challenge is navigating the French system as an entrepreneur, which has been difficult, but I’m figuring it out.
What is your relationship like with locals and other expats?
I am so grateful to have landed in a place where my neighbors have welcomed me. I know and have great relationships with local business owners and have made a lot of friends in the large international community here. I find people to be incredibly friendly and generous – I really feel like I hit the jackpot in finding this little slice of paradise.
What advice would you give to someone thinking of making a similar move?
Make the most of the experience – try to learn the language, respect and embrace the culture, engage with locals (even if you struggle with the language; they often appreciate the effort), and accept that things aren’t necessarily the same as back home. Celebrate the victories of overcoming challenges, try not to dwell on the difficulties, and enjoy the adventure.